Highly Personal Testimony for Controversial (and Proprietary) Male Performance Enhancer

Monday, 13 April 2015 19:08 administrator
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ADs By CHAD!

Sometimes even I can't play up to my own tempo markings. Boy, is that a bummer. But ever since my friend ANONYMOUS gave me a whiff of "Hyper-Vivace for MenTM" I'm super confident no matter how I feel -- because now I know, when I can't keep up to speed, I can always speed-it-up.

This astonishing video, recorded off an astonishing video found online will give you an idea of what can happen when you, with guidance from a mentor, accelerate in the slipstream of Hyper-Vivace for MenTM.

That's when I use "Hyper-Vivace for Men." HyperVivaceTM isn't like those other over-the-top male metronomic velocity enhancing formulas for guys who can't keep it uptempo. And it works whether you've been drilling hard at your Czerny Exercise Velocitator or just putzing around with 120 beats per minute thinking you had it going on.

And fellas, chicks know when a man is under the influence of Hyper-VivaceTM: The dude glows; while the other cats are marveling at riffs that seem to defy gravity, the Hyper-Vivace man is just starting his engine while their booster rockets fail.

Hyper-Vivace is not for all men and can effect public performance in situations where it is not possible to crank your Speedos by artificial means.

Side effects may include, blisters on your fingers, sensation of teeth rotating in their sockets, discorporation of limbs, aphasia, bee swarms, angina, anxiety-producing accusations of "cheating," belief in a power almost as great as oneself; kawshiorkor; spenalmegaly, Tardive's dystopia, male pattern Balzac with itching and swelling, inability to perform anything less than molto-allegro-scherzando, diminished interest in the small affairs of governments, TV shows and breathing and therefore, a shortened lifespan, The Bends, nose bleeds, rin-tin-tinnitus and, in 1 out of 150,000 trials with naked mole rats, a complete breakdown of behavioral norms necessary for proper functioning in a societal matrix that just wants to bleed you dry.

Oh yeh, guys?: Don't be surprised, if, after a couple "runs" with HVMtm, you get a powerful urge to split this pop stand with the next Gypsy caravan through town.

So. Your call: You wanna be one of those schlubs who fakes it till he makes it? Or do you wanna crossover and catch-up with a retreating universe?

Try HyperVivaceTM today. Stop practicing and play like a man!

 

– "CHAD"



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Last Updated on Monday, 13 April 2015 19:27